I believe I am beginning to feel better. I have been exercising more consistently and have been trying to keep my protein up and eat, but eat less at any one time and think that is helping my physical and emotional health. These past few weeks have been torturous on the entire family and it is going to take some real time, but think I am starting to come out of it all. Losing dad felt too much like when I lost Sue, but now that time is passing and i am doing things to not only keep busy, but improve my emotional state and mental state it is really helping.
I enjoy exercising and am doing all of this for me. Call it selfish, but if I don't take care of me, no one is going to to and I have to love me before I can love God or anyone else and cannot help anyone else if I don't love and take care of Lin first. I think as Christians we are sold a bill of goods by feeling and teaching like we have to love ourselves last, because if I don't love the Lin that God created, then how can I love Him or anybody else; I cannot.