4/21/12

Lonely tonight

I guess I am just feeling lonely tonight.  The last couple of weeks have been really painful and my back has really hurt.  I was hoping to have had the implant implanted by now and was happy to have gone to Marie and Jas's wedding, but it took a lot out of me.  I really missed Sue not being there with me and thought back to nearly 13 years ago at our wedding when Marie, who had just turned 14 was a junior bridesmaid in our wedding.  She was so pretty then and was a gorgeous bride.  I just hope they have a happy marriage like Sue and I had.
I think I am lonely because I am so missing her and the house just seems so quiet tonight.  I have a good friend who at some point I would not mind dating and think she would not mind dating me.  We were hoping to get together when I went to Danny's at Christmas, but it just did not work out because it was Christmas weekend and we really would have liked to have gone out somewhere jsut the two of us.  I am really hoping that Dan wants mom and I to come down at some point soon and if we do, then I will call Betsy and we will go out by ourselves at least one time.  This is a very sweet Christian lady whose ex-husband emotionally and verbally abused and for the life of me don't understand because Betsy is a sweetheart.  She is the kind of woman I have been praying for ever since Sue died and if something happened between us, I would have to move to Georgia because that is where her youngest is in school, but don't think that would be too bad in the long run too.
I have been thinking about wanting to date and to be married again a good bit and also know that she has to be the one that God chooses for me and of course has to be a strong Christian and I would not want it any other way.
I really wish that Sue could have been with me at marie's wedding because it was a lovely wedding and know she would have been so proud of marie and how grown up she has become.

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